S3 E7 Juliet Is The Sun

untitled juliet

Juliet Is The Sun

Written by Brad Radnitz

Marcia gets the lead in the school play of Romeo and Juliet. She changes from feelings of self-doubt to a major attitude. Hope you enjoy the script.

CAST OF CHARACTERS

MIKE BRADY

CAROL BRADY

ALICE NELSON

GREG BRADY

MARCIA BRADY

PETER BRADY

JAN BRADY

BOBBY BRADY

CINDY BRADY

HAROLD AXELROD, boy who plays Romeo

MISS GOODWIN, teacher conducting the play

(The episode begins with Peter and Jan coming home from school on their bikes. They run into the house, screaming for their mother.)

Peter: Mom!

Jan: Mom, Mom, we’re in the school play.

Peter: We’re in the school play, Romeo and Juliet.

Carol (pleased): Oh, that’s terrific.

Alice: What parts did you get?

Peter: Palace guards. I say hark.

Jan: And I say who goes there.

Alice: Hey, they know their lines already.

Carol: How did Marcia do?

Peter: She tried out for the part of the nurse.

Marcia: And she was great.

Peter: But Miss Goodwin hasn’t made up her mind about the big parts yet.

Jan: I hope she gets to be the nurse, then we can all be in the play.

Carol: How about that? First the Barrymores, now the Bradys.

(The phone rings.)

Carol: I’ll get it, Alice. (She answers) Hello. Oh, hello, Ms. Goodwin. Yes, Peter and Jan were just telling me the good news. Yeah, oh, yeah, I think Harold Axelrod will make a great Romeo. Marcia? (She gets excited) Really? Well, of course I’ll tell her, Ms. Goodwin. Oh, thank you so much for calling, good-bye. (She hangs up)

Alice: What about Marcia?

Carol (excited): She got the part of Juliet!

Jan: Juliet? Wow!

Peter: She didn’t even try out for that part!

Jan: That’s the starring role! (She runs) Marcia, Marcia, come here quick!

Carol: Isn’t it a wonderful surprise?

Alice: She’ll be thrilled right out of her sneakers.

(Marcia comes in.)

Marcia: What is it? What’s all the excitement?

Carol: Marcia, Ms. Goodwin just called. You got the part of Juliet.

Marcia: Juliet? But I tried out for the nurse.

Alice: But you got the starring part.

Carol: Isn’t that marvelous?

Marcia: I think that’s awful.

(Marcia leaves the kitchen and everyone else in confusion. The scene fades.)

untitled noble and beautiful

(Marcia is in her room and Mike and Carol knock on the door.)

Marcia: Come in.

Mike (coming in with Carol): Hi, honey.

Marcia: Hi.

Mike: I heard you got the part of Juliet, and I also heard you don’t want it.

Marcia: That’s right.

Mike: Mind if I ask why?

Marcia: I just don’t think I should play the part, that’s all.

Mike: Why?

Marcia: I didn’t even try out for that part.

Carol: But the most important thing is Marcia is that Ms. Goodwin thinks you’re the best one for it.

Marcia (bitterly): And I know why, because you’re the chairman of the play committee.

(She moves from her bed to standing near her desk.)

Carol: Look, Marcia, I volunteered to be the chairman because I wanted your school to present a good play. I didn’t want to help you get a good part.

Mike: Marcia, Ms. Goodwin isn’t going to miscast the leading role in the play just to please your mother.

Marcia: Then why would she give me the part? Juliet is supposed to be beautiful and noble, and I’m not anything like that.

Carol: Marcia, that’s nonsense. You’re a beautiful girl. And besides that, you’re a very good actress.

Marcia: You have to say that, you’re my mother.

Mike: I say it, and I’m not your mother. Come on, you look beautiful and noble to me.

Carol: The trouble is, you don’t think you are.

Mike: That’s right. It’s your belief in yourself that counts, you know. You are what you think you are.

Marcia: You mean, if I think I’m beautiful and noble, then I will be beautiful and noble?

Mike: That’s right, if you believe it, everybody else will believe it, too.

Carol: Think about it, Marcia. And you can give your answer to Ms. Goodwin in the morning. Okay?

(They leave the room. Marcia sits down and goes to the mirror, then she closes her eyes.)

Marcia: Marcia Brady, you’re noble and beautiful. (She opens her eyes) Baloney.

(Greg is downstairs having a glass of milk and speaking to Alice.)

Greg: Alice, did you ever do any acting while you were in school?

Alice: Did I ever do any acting? You know, I played the title role in our senior class play. Critics said it was the most unusual performance part they’ve ever seen.

Greg: What part was it?

Alice: Julius Caesar. It was an all-girl school.

Greg (laughing): Looks like an all-boy school doing Little Women.

(Alice sits down to a glass of milk with Greg.)

Alice: Oh yeah, yeah. Oh, it was a lot of fun, though. Marcia’s gonna be missing an awful lot if she’s not in the school play.

Greg: I don’t get what her problem is, she’d make a great Juliet.

Alice: I know exactly what her problem is.

Greg: What?

(Peter, Bobby and Jan are putting a jigsaw puzzle together on the floor and overhear Alice.)

Alice: It’s psychological. It’s a mental block, caused by her lack of confidence in herself.

Greg: Wow, that’s really deep. How did you figure that out?

Alice: Your mom and dad told me.

(Greg laughs.)

Greg: I just don’t get it. I mean, Marcia’s really a very groovy girl.

Alice: Well, you know she’s groovy, and I know she’s groovy. But she doesn’t know she’s groovy.

(The younger kids are still listening.)

Greg: It’s weird she can’t see herself as others see her.

Alice: I know one way that might open her eyes.

Greg: What?

Alice: A few words from your mouth to her ear. If you tell her what you think she might begin to believe it herself.

(The next scene has Marcia in the bathroom washing her face when Bobby and Cindy come in to see her.)

Marcia: I’m not through, yet. (they stand there and stare at her. She turns around.) Well.

Bobby: You sure look pretty, Marcia.

Cindy: And groovy too.

(They leave and Marcia turns around to look in the mirror.)

Marcia: They’re out of their minds.

(Next, Marcia is on her bed doing homework and Peter and Jan come to see her.)

Peter: Marcia, can we have a little help?

Jan: We’re having trouble with our lines for the play.

Marcia: Sure, what’s the problem?

Jan: Well, Peter’s got hark down pretty good, but I’m having trouble with my line.

Marcia: Well, let’s hear you say it.

Jan: Well, that’s just it. I don’t know quite how to say it. Should I say, who goes there, who goes there or who goes there? See what I mean?

Marcia: Just say it plain. Who goes there.

Peter (pleased): Hey, that’s it!

Jan: Oh, gee, thanks Marcia, you’re a terrific actress.

Peter: Come on, let’s practice before we forget how she said it.

Jan: Yeah, okay.

Peter: Hark.

Jan: Who goes there? Is that right?

Marcia: Yeah.

Jan: Oh, gee, thanks, you’re a terrific actress.

(They leave.)

Marcia (to herself): Terrific actress?

(Greg comes in from the bathroom.)

Greg: You got a minute, Marcia?

Marcia: Sure, what do you want?

Greg (sitting down with her): Do you know of a guy named Lloyd Leeds?

Marcia: No, I don’t think so.

Greg: Well, he sure knows you.

Marcia: He does?

Greg: Yeah, he’s in my English class. He wants to meet you.

Marcia: Me, why?

Greg: Obviously he thinks you’re a really groovy chick.

Marcia (excited): A high school boy really thinks I’m groovy?

Greg: A lot of people think you’re groovy.

Marcia: Honest?

Greg: I even think you’re groovy. For a sister, that is.

(He gets up and leaves.)

Marcia: Thanks, Greg.

(She smiles and returns to her homework. Then she gets up and goes to the mirror, while all the things her family said go through her mind.)

(Next, she is downstairs getting ready to leave for school. She is in a much chipper mood.)

Marcia (to Alice and Carol): Good morning.

Carol: Oh, good morning, honey.

(She kisses her good morning and hands her a glass of orange juice.)

Marcia: It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it.

Alice: Lovely.

Marcia: Mom, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking since last night.

Carol: And?

Marcia: Well, I never thought I was the Juliet type, but everybody else thinks I am.

Carol: Well, you are.

Alice (dramatically): Right, a rose by any other name (back to her normal voice) is still 10 bucks a dozen.

Marcia: I think I can do it. I’m going to be Juliet.

Carol: Oh, Marcia, I’m so glad. And your father is going to be so happy.

Marcia: You know, he said you are what you think you are. So from now on, I’m beautiful and noble. I’m Juliet.

(She energetically runs out of the kitchen, while Bobby passes by her.)

Bobby: Wow, what was that?

Carol: That was the power of positive thinking.

(Next, Jan and Peter are rehearsing their lines in the living rooms.)

Peter: Hark!

Jan: Who goes there?

Peter: Well, what do you think?

Jan: Not bad, I guess.

Peter: I think we should do it meaner.

Jan: Yeah, let’s do it again only meaner.

(Mike walks in and they repeat their lines.)

Mike: It’s I, your father, I bring secret documents to the Brady house.

Peter: How do we sound, Dad?

Jan: Are we fierce enough?

Mike: Gosh, I thought for sure I was a goner there. (He puts his briefcase down on the chair) Where’s your mama?

Jan: She’s in the kitchen.

Mike: Okay, troops, carry on the good work.

(He heads to the kitchen.)

Peter: Hark!

Jan: Who goes there?

(Mike finds Carol in the kitchen watching Marcia rehearse with Harold, who was cast as Romeo.)

Mike: Hi, honey. (She shushes him) Home from work early but you don’t have to keep it a secret. (She shushes him again) Why are we whispering?

Carol: Because Marcia and Harold Axelrod are rehearsing their lines.

Mike: Who’s Harold Axelrod?

Carol (annoyed): Romeo.

(He goes closer and watches them.)

Mike (to Carol): Romeo wears glasses?

(They rehearse a few more lines and Marcia reminds him of something.)

Marcia: It says you’re supposed to kiss Juliet.

(Harold checks it on the script, then balks.)

Harold: Uh, I got to go now, Marcia. But thanks, a lot, you were super.

Marcia (in dramatic tone): Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night, till it be morrow.

(She puts her hand up for Harold to kiss it.)

Harold (shaking her hand): You’re really great.

Marcia: I am?

Harold: You really are Juliet.

(Mike and Carol look from the kitchen in delight. Next, Marcia is in the bathroom. She is combing her hair in the mirror.)

Marcia: You are Juliet. You’re noble and beautiful.

Jan (shouting from outside): You’re also hogging the bathroom!

(She and Cindy are banging on the door, as are Peter and Bobby, asking her to let them use it. Greg comes in the room.)

Greg: Hey, hey, hey, hey. What’s all the noise.

Bobby (angry): Juliet won’t let us in!

Peter: She thinks it’s her private buff.

Greg: Ah, she’s getting worse and worse since we told her she was noble and beautiful. (She knocks on the door) Come on, Marcia, some of us peasants want to get in here.

Marcia (opening the door): Greg, I agree.

Greg: That you’re hogging the bathroom?

Marcia: No, that you’re peasants.

(Next, the girls are in their bedroom.)

Marcia: I need more closet space, children.

(Jan is helping Cindy with her homework and Marcia moves their clothes to give herself more space.)

Jan: Marcia, what are you doing to my dresses? They’re all smushed up!

Cindy: Mine are even smushier.

Marcia: There’s no such word as smush. Besides, mine have to look perfect.

Jan: What’s so special about your dresses?

Marcia: Everywhere I go at school, people are always looking at me, I’m Juliet.

Jan: Well I’m in the play too, you know.

Marcia: Just one line. It’s different with me, I’m the star.

Jan: Well la di da.

Cindy: What does that mean?

Jan: It mans that Marcia’s getting to be a pain in the neck. (Cindy repeats her) You’re not gonna go around messing up my dresses, Marcia.

(They all get into a big argument and Mike and Carol come in.)

Mike: Hey!

Carol: Girls!

Mike: What’s all the commotion about?

Cindy: Marcia’s trying to hog up the closet.

Jan: And not only that, we can’t even talk around here. We have to be quiet so the star can study her lines.

Marcia: I am the star.

(Jan and Cindy yell at her and it leads to another argument.)

Carol: Girls, girls, you’re supposed to be loving sisters, remember.

Marcia: I can’t help it if I have to practice my lines. Everybody wanted me to be in the play.

Carol: That’s right, Marcia.

Mike: But you’re not the first lady of the American Theater. Now listen, girls, being the lead in the play is a strain. Can’t you co-operate with Marcia?

Carol: Now, come on and behave, okay.

(They leave the room and Marcia gloats.)

Marcia: I think I better rehearse my lines now. You and Cindy study in the family room.

(Jan and Cindy stop at the boys’ room.)

Jan: I just thought I’d tell you not to breathe too loud. Her majesty is rehearsing her lines.

Greg: Oh, no, she’s really getting to be too much.

Bobby: Yeah, we can’t even get in the bathroom till 3 o’clock in the morning.

Peter: It sure was a swell idea convincing Marcia how great she was.

Jan: Yeah, what have we done?

Greg: I’ll tell you what we’ve done, we created a small, blonde Frankenstein.

Bobby: Yeah, my sister, the monster.

(He makes a funny impression of a monster as the scene fades.)

untitled marcia and harold

(The next scene has Carol on the phone with a Mr. Schultz.)

Carol: Well, the school really appreciates it, Mr. Schultz. Mmm hmm. Well, let’s see (she looks in the newspaper) your ad will appear on page three in the play program. Yes, Romeo and Juliet. Thank you very much, we really appreciate it, Mr. Schultz. Bye. (She hangs up the phone) Well (to Alice) that’s another ad from the play program from Schultz’s delicatessen.

Alice: What a combination, Shakespherian salami.

(Peter comes in.)

Peter: Mom, where’s Marcia? She’s supposed to help me clean up the garage.

Carol: Well, I think she’s upstairs in her room. Why don’t you go up and remind her.

Peter (making hand gestures): Hark, who goes there?

(He goes upstairs.)

Carol (to Alice): Hark, what was that?

(They laugh. Peter finds Marcia in her bedroom combing her hair.)

Peter: Are you brushing your hair again?

Marcia: I have to brush it 100 times, three times a day. That’s what makes it beautiful.

Peter: You’re gonna brush it right off your head.

Marcia: Is that what you came in to tell me?

Peter: No, I want to remind your of your share of the work around here.

Marcia: Me?

Peter: Yeah, you. You’re supposed to help me clean out the garage.

Marcia: Do I have to remind you that I’m the star of the school play. Juliet wouldn’t do such menial labor.

Peter: Oh boy, Marcia, your head has gotten so big, I don’t think there’s even room for us in the same garage.

(He leaves the room. Next, Marcia is rehearsing with Harold while the other kids make fun of her.)

Marcia (in dramatic tone): Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo. Deny thy father and refuse thy name. Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I’ll no longer be a Capulet.

Harold: Shall I hear more? Or shall I speak of this?

(Jan and Cindy are standing at the door to the kitchen, while Greg and Bobby are over at the window.)

Jan (to Cindy): It’s a wonder she lets him speak at all.

Marcia: Ignore them, Harold. (back to rehearsal) Tis but my name that is my enemy. (Bobby mimics her line. She closes the curtains on him.) These kids have no regard for Shakespeare. (to Bobby) Pardon me with such sweet sorrow.  (She then goes to Jan and Cindy) And you two stay out of here too. We need to rehearse, alone. (She shuts the door) Okay, let’s take it from is it thy hand. (She goes back to rehearsal) Is it thy hand, thy foot, thy arm, thy face.

Harold: I take thee thy word, call me but love…

Marcia: No, say it like this (more dramatic) Call thee but love.

Harold: Well, okay, call thee but love…

Marcia: No, Harold, that’s not the way I said to do it.

Harold: Well Marcia, don’t you think it’s better if you do your part your way and let me  do mine my way?

Marcia (angry): Not if it’s gonna ruin the play!

Harold: Gee, I don’t think I’m ruining the play.

Marcia: You will if you do Romeo like that.

(She starts to walk out.)

Harold: Where are you going?

Marcia: You’re acting like a child and I refuse to rehearse with a child!

Harold: I’m gonna be 15! That’s the same age as the real Romeo was.

Marcia: That Romeo was mature. I’m gonna rehearse with a mature Romeo.

(She leaves and Harold is left with an upset look on his face. We next see Marcia at the staircase, rehearsing with Mike and Carol.)

Marcia (dramatically): Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo. Deny thy father and forgive his name.

Carol: Deny thy father and refuse thy name.

Marcia: Deny thy father and refuse thy name. Or if  not, I’ll forget that I’m a Capulet.

Mike (laughing): Wait a minute, honey. You’re forgetting I’ll no longer be a Capulet.

Carol: And the line is, Marcia, or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I’ll no longer be a Capulet.

Marcia (abruptly): What’s the difference?

Mike: Well, you’re changing a lot of words, Marcia.

Marcia: I just don’t feel right saying them the other way.

Carol: But if you change the words, you also change the meaning.

Marcia: I have to say them word for word?

Mike: I think it would be a little difficult to improve on Shakespeare, don’t you?

Marcia: But what’s more important than the feeling and the instinct of an actress?

Carol: Honey, even the greatest actresses in the world doesn’t change Shakespeare.

Marcia: Well, I’m going to.

Mike (firmly): Now, wait a second, Marcia. You’re being a little silly about this. Now you’re being carried away.

Marcia (bitterly): You don’t understand about acting, and Harold doesn’t either. That’s why I refused to rehearse with him.

Carol: Is that why he left so early?

Marcia: I wish he would leave the play, we could use another Romeo. Well, I guess I had enough rehearsal tonight.

(She goes to her room.)

Carol (to Mike): You can judge an actress by her temperament, but I think she’s about ready for an Oscar.

Mike: First the part was a little too big for her, now I think, maybe, she’s a little too big for the part.

(The next scene has Marcia at school rehearsing with the rest of the cast.)

Ms. Goodwin: All right, children, places please. now when I say curtains, all the guests will come on. All right.? ready, and, curtains.

(The kids come out and take their places. Harold and Marcia start rehearsing.)

Harold: Please, Juliet, move not. (He walks toward her) While the prayers defect I take, thus from my lips, by thine,  my sin is purged.

(She gives him her hand for him to kiss, but his hat falls off when he takes it.)

Marcia (annoyed): Harold, you’re so clumsy!

Harold (looking for his hat): I can’t help it, my mask is in the way.

Ms. Goodwin: Harold, do you think you can do the scene without your glasses.

Harold: If I do, Ms. Goodwin, I may never find Juliet.

Ms. Goodwin: Well, let’s try it anyway. (Marcia walks away while Harold hands Ms. Goodwin his glasses) Okay Harold, let’s go back to have not saint.

(Carol arrives and is looking on behind the curtain.)

Harold: Have not saints lips and holy palmers too.

Marcia (from the balcony): I, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.

Harold: Where did she go?

Ms. Goodwin: Marcia, what are you dong up there? We didn’t stage it that way.

Marcia: I just felt like moving.

Ms. Goodwin: We staged this play very carefully, Marcia. Now it’s not fair to the others to do something unexpected.

Marcia: Ms. Goodwin, I’m only trying to improve the play. Is it wrong to try to improve it?

Ms. Goodwin: Well, get down from here anyway. (Marcia angrily gets down from the balcony) harold, Harold, now go back again to have not saints lips.

Harold: Have not saints lips. (Marcia goes back to her original position but Harold’s back is to her) Have not saints lips and holy palmers too. (Marcia motions him to her direction) Oh, there you are.

Marcia: Saints do not move thou grant for prayers sake.

Ms. Goodwin: You skipped a line, Marcia.

Marcia: I’m sorry, Ms. Goodwin, but with all these distractions, it’s hard to concentrate.

Harold (whining): What did I do now, Marcia?

Marcia (petulantly): If you could keep your voice from squeaking it would be a help.

Harold: I quit squeaking last year.

Ms. Goodwin: All right, children. Marcia, I don’t think you should blame Harold for your own mistakes.

Marcia: Yes, Ms. Goodwin.

Ms. Goodwin: That’s enough rehearsal for today.

(Marcia, Harold and the other kids leave. Carol, who heard the entire scene from behind the curtain, approaches Ms. Goodwin.)

Carol: Ms. Goodwin.

Ms. Goodwin: Oh, hello, Mrs. Brady, I didn’t know you were here.

Carol: I just came by to show you the final layouts of the program, but, I can see you have a much bigger problem.

Ms. Goodwin: I’m afraid so.

Carol: Well, my husband and I have tried to reason with Marcia but…

Ms. Goodwin: Oh, she can do the part just fine if only she…

Carol: If only she didn’t think she was junior high’s answer to Sarah Bernhardt.

Ms. Goodwin: And we don’t have much time. There are only a few more rehearsals before the play goes on.

Carol: Well, I, think we have to do something about it, Ms. Goodwin. Let’s hope it’s the right thing.

(Next, Marcia is in her room combing her hair when Carol comes in to speak to her.)

Carol: Marcia.

Marcia: Yes, Mother.

Carol: I, sent the final program to the printers this afternoon.

Marcia: I wish Harold’s name wasn’t in it, he was awful at rehearsal today.

Carol: Well Marcia, I’m afraid your name is not going to be in it.

Marcia: What do you mean?

Carol: I was at the rehearsal this afternoon.

Marcia: You were?

Carol: Afterwards Mrs. Goodwin and I talked, and, we decided that for the good of the play, and for your own good, she would have to replace you.

Marcia: Replace me?

Carol: Yes, your understudy is gonna replace you.

Marcia (upset): Tina, but I’m better than her.

Carol: Marcia, it has nothing to do with you being better than her. It’s your attitude.

Marcia: What do you mean my attitude?

Carol: Well, you’ve become rude to your friends and family, you’ve become impossible to live with.

Marcia (flustered): Mom, you’re being unfair.

Carol: Marcia, I’m not blaming you. It’s not all your fault. We encouraged you, but, you let it go to your head.

Marcia (on the verge of tears): You don’t understand, Mom.

Carol: Marcia, I do understand, but you brought all of this on yourself. I’m sorry.

(She leaves the room)

Marcia: Mom!

(Marcia starts crying. Next, Carol and Alice are helping Jan and Peter with their costumes for the play.)

Alice (to Peter): Yeah, that’s gonna do it.

Peter: Thanks, Alice.

Carol: Now listen, you kids hang these up carefully. You hear?

Jan: We will, thanks, Mom. Thanks for fixing it.

Peter: Hark!

Jan: Who goes there?

(They repeat themselves and run out of the family room. Mike comes in.)

Mike: Marcia change her mind about some food?

Carol: No, dear. And I can’t blame her for not being hungry.

(The phone rings. Mike answers.)

Mike: Hello. Yes. Yes, just a second. (to Carol) Honey, it’s for you, it’s Ms. Goodwin.

Carol: Well, I hope she’s got some good news. We can sure use some around here. (She gets up and goes to the phone) Hello Ms. Goodwin. Oh, that’s a shame. Gee, I’m sorry but I already sent the program to the printers. If I think of someone I’ll call you right away, sure. Bye. (to Mike and Alice) Lady Capulet has the mumps, she can’t play the part.

Mike: Hope she doesn’t give it to the whole town of Verona.

Alice: If she does it will be the lumpiest cast in history.

Carol: Well, I just hope it’s not too late to get someone else for the part.

(Marcia appears.)

Marcia: Mom. Do you think they’ll let me do it? (Pause) I’ll learn the lines real fast, word for word, and I won’t cause any trouble, I promise.

(The adults ponder before Carol gives an naswer.)

Carol: Well, it’s a very small part and not very glamorous. You’d be playing the part of Juliet’s mother.

Marcia: That’s okay.

Carol: Welcome back to the play, honey.

(She gives her a hug.)

Alice: Well, let’s hear it for Lady Capulet.

(They clap and the scene fades.)

untitled causing trouble

(The final scene has the family coming home from the play. Carol and Mike send the kids upstairs to bed.)

Alice (to Carol): Oh, I really enjoyed that.

Carol: I’m so proud, I tell you.

Alice: Romeo and Juliet is such a sad play.

Carol: Yeah.

Mike: It’s no musical comedy.

Carol: Alice, which part do you think was the saddest?

Alice: Well, the part where Romeo died is sad. The part where Juliet died was sad, too. (She sighs) But I think the saddest part of all was when Jan said who goes there before Peter said hark.

(Carol and Mike and go upstairs. Alice goes to her room.)

Carol: Good night, Alice. See you in the morning.

images hark who goes there

                                      THE END

 

 

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